Preppers X-mas
December 10, 2012 in Preparedness
It was the night before X-mas and the shit hit the fan
There was chaos and turmoil throughout the whole land
The preps were packed neatly, all stacked up with care
And we hung out our sign that says “LOOTERS BEWARE”
We tucked in the kids and I went out on guard
That’s when I heard a strange noise out in the yard
I ran to the window and all I could see
Was dozens of Goons that were running at me
I met them at the door with my gun in my hand
I said “I won’t go to your camp, this is a free land”
That’s when things started to go all to hell
They started advancing when I heard someone yell
I looked overhead, what I saw made me woozy
It was Santa in his sleigh and he was packin’ an Uzi
“Get back thugs” said Santa, “this land is still free”
“And when you fuck with it, you fuck with me”
They just kept on marching so I hit the ground
And I laid there and watched Santa mow them all down
He set down a package and in the blink of an eye
He was back in his sleigh and off into the sky
I picked up the package, oh I just had to know
It was an AR15 with a pretty red bow
So my good friends when the shit hits the fan
Don’t forget Santa, because he is the man


James said on December 20, 2012
Ho, ho, ho… !
James said on December 20, 2012
Unfortunately… there is no Santa. He was collateral damage in a Drone strike back in Bush administration days. CIA thought that pointy hat looked like too much like a turban.
Christine said on December 19, 2012
Wonderful, a real spirit lifter.
GiveMeLiberty said on December 13, 2012
LOL, good job!
Patrick said on December 11, 2012
LOL good poem, Since Santa is made up, why not picture him with and uzi, LOL
Funny story though, I knew a guy once who had a grey beard and the first time I met him, he was in a Santa suit. I was only six then the funny thing is he used to preach about a one world government back in the late 70′s and early 80′s. He bought a bunch of property in the woods and sold my Dad a small piece of it. Today that is my bug-out location. So maybe Santa is real, but Howard only carried a .22.
R.I.P. Howard you are still missed!